If you see any red flags while dating, stop dating them before the fourth date, or you could fall for them and it will be too late,if your partner does things that upset you, it will be those issues your partner has, that will cause a lot of arguments and you spend way to much time on those self help and relationship books trying to fix things that can't be fixed,and not enjoying what you should have.
I have been married three times, only wanted to be once but i couldn't fix the problems with partners with jealousy issues, hidden addictions. I choose to leave them. Counseling wasn't glorified then. I have lost my adult son, he just finished College and I learned who loved me more than others Who would stand by me and miss a game and a cruise because I was more important. That's love to me. Can you go back, hmmmm, maybe that breakup shouldn't ever had happened. My husband now isn't empathetic. He isn't the father of my kids. I dislike yelling, fighting, smoking, drugs and a man who has his eyes on another woman all night as he sits with his wife.. What is up with that anyway. Any guys out there have a pretty wife and can't sit without taking attention from her and giving it to another across the room, he should be left behind, right??
I do not know your particular situation and I am not a counsellor but I do know that men and women communicate differently and you cannot change another person but only how you respond to them. I highly recommend that you read the book "How to Improve Your Marriage Without Talking About It" by Drs. Patricia Love and Steven Stosny. Some quotes from the back cover: "Men want closer marriages just as much as women do, but not if they have to act like women." The secret of the silent male is this: his wife supplies the meaning in his life." "Talking makes women move closer; it makes men move away."
I hope this helps you.
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