“When I found out my husband cheated after 4 years of marriage it completely devastated me. It wasn’t just that my cheating man had slept with another woman; I couldn’t understand how he could say he loved me on one hand and completely betray me on the other.”
So I was left with this question: Does he still love me?
Does this woman’s struggle sound familiar to you? Do you wonder how your partner could cheat on you if he truly loved you?
If so, you aren’t alone.
This question is quite difficult to answer. There is only one person who can give you a real answer to that question, and that’s your husband. Whether you believe him or not reflects the level of trust in your relationship.
Here are a few insights to Help You Find Out:
It’s not easy to understand that a cheating man can be a man that loves you at the same time. You think that if he loved you he wouldn’t to something so hurtful to you.
Sometimes the cheating partner says there are reasons for going outside the relationship that have to do with the marriage, and sometimes the cheater will try to make it seem as if it had nothing to do with what was happening inside the marriage.
It’s definitely possible that your spouse still loves you despite that fact that he or she cheated on you. Sometimes the love is still very much there; it’s just been buried - Buried under years of miscommunications.
It may also be buried in the hurt of emotional outbursts or years of silence. People get confused. They lose their way. But just because they are lost, it doesn’t necessarily mean they have fallen out of love with you.
So where do you go from here?
This is a question that will also help you determine whether your husband still loves you. Ask him this: “If I could give you a magic pill that would make you suddenly fall deeply in love with ME again, would you take it?”
1. If he says YES – This is good news. Your husband probably still has deep feelings for you and he wants to rebuild your relationship. He just doesn’t know how to do it.
2. If he says something like “I love you, but I am no longer in love with you”, or he tells you he has to think about it – It’s time YOU think about your answer to this question as well.
3. If he says “No I wouldn’t take the pill” – Your husband could be no longer in love with you. But it could also mean that his feelings are so buried that he is no longer aware of his feelings for you. In some cases he will realize that he still loves you only when he has to sign the divorce papers.
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I wish you a long and happy relationship,