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Trina Read's Blog (117)

Sex After Baby--Breakfast TV Interview

The hosts of Breakfast TV Calgary and I discuss Sex After Baby as well as my Six Month Sex Challenge. My son was seven weeks at the time--he' now 12 weeks--and he makes several cameo… Continue

Added by Trina Read on January 13, 2010 at 9:14am — No Comments

Week #7--Breastfeeding Making Intercourse Uncomfortable

Week #7—Six Month Sex Challenge: Pink vs. Pink Water Lubricant. I need to use a silicone based lubricant, and lots of it, while I’m breast feeding.

Lesson I learned from last week:
Trying to get sex back on track only highlights what wasn’t dealt with before the baby was born.

Breastfeeding Making Intercourse Uncomfortable

After my last blog post about not knowing whether to carry on with this challenge, I had to sit down and do a lot of hard… Continue

Added by Trina Read on January 10, 2010 at 9:30am — 1 Comment

Week #6--New Year and a New Sex Life?

Week #6 Six Month Sex Challenge—Is good intention enough to help a flagging sex life?

Lesson that I learned last week: Our sex life will never be the hot crazy sex it once was; and yet we now can create something deeper and richer to take us over time.

Does the New Year really bring with it a new sex life?

New Years is a time to make resolutions with intent in order to change or transform ourselves for the better. Intention. Such a little… Continue

Added by Trina Read on January 2, 2010 at 1:15pm — No Comments

Week #5--Two and a Half Christmas Stories

Week #5 of the Six Month Sex Challenge

Lesson I learned last week: When I stretch myself too thin, I get snappy with my husband and, of course, I don’t want to have sex with him.

Two and a half stories for this blog. Both seem unrelated to my current sex life and, yet, both are integral to what is presently happening.

Story #1 ½

It was our first Christmas together and I was opening the first Christmas present from my husband.… Continue

Added by Trina Read on December 27, 2009 at 9:50am — 1 Comment

Week #4--Why Did I Think I Could Have Sex This Week?

This is week #4 of my Six Month Sex Challenge. This week it's all about getting through the Christmas season stress and not killing each other.

What I learned last week: Oral sex is an easy way to add sex into the week.

Why Did I Think I Could Have Sex This Week?

Okay, I’ll admit it. I bit off way more than I could chew preparing for Christmas. Honestly, I thought baking 30 dozen cookies, shopping, mailing cards, potty training, working on… Continue

Added by Trina Read on December 18, 2009 at 8:15am — No Comments

Week #3--Finding Intimacy in the Funniest of Places

Week #3 of my Six Month Sex Challenge

This week I focus on my husband’s sexual needs

Lesson learned from last week: Having my sexual needs met won’t always be greeted with the type of enthusiasm I would like.

Finding Intimacy in the Funniest of Places

The pain in my stomach became more pronounced Monday afternoon. By Monday night it was just plain bad. Tuesday morning the pain hadn’t gone away and I had to call my husband home from work… Continue

Added by Trina Read on December 13, 2009 at 10:13am — 1 Comment

Week #2--My Needs vs. The Bills and Jets Game

Lessoned learned from last week: I can no longer count on weekend naps to fit in sex. Crap!!! That completely bites the big burrito.

Part of my Six Month Sex Challenge is to make one week about my sexual needs and the alternative week about what my husband would like. So to start, this week is all about me. Me, me, me, me.

For months now I’ve been fantasizing about a hot rock massage, I decided that what I wanted out of “sex” this week was a lovely… Continue

Added by Trina Read on December 6, 2009 at 12:12pm — 1 Comment

Week #1--How do we make time to have sex?

You’d think being married for eight years and me being a sex expert would make the whole reconnection after baby thing easier. Nope. The two month absence in sex wedged a tiny “how do I initiate” awkwardness between us.

So there I was figuring out how I was going to get the sex ball rolling in a fun and light hearted way. Admittedly I had a few romantic notions of a sweet and tender, uninterrupted reunion—where teeth were brushed, legs shaved and I was wearing something other than… Continue

Added by Trina Read on November 29, 2009 at 9:55am — 1 Comment

Six Month Sex Challenge

Sex after baby. What a crazy time in a couple’s sex life.

It’s been six weeks since I had my newest son, Evan, and it’s time to resume sexual relations. With my first son, Andrew (who’s now 26 months), trying to get sex back on track was, at times, a complete gong show. And that was with me making a concerted effort to have sex at least once a week.

With that in mind this time around, I’ve decided to make sex after this baby a project. For the next six… Continue

Added by Trina Read on November 23, 2009 at 9:30am — 2 Comments

Men's Erogenous Zones

It’s important when contemplating a man’s erogenous zones, to think outside the “penis box”.

Yes, of course, men want to experience maximum penis-love, however, when you branch out to other parts of his body it gives both of you the opportunity to experience a sense of erotica. Erotica being the holy grail of sizzling sex.

Erogenous zones you probably already know:

His Penis: The 1/3—2/3 rule.

The first third (or head/ glans) of a man’s penis has… Continue

Added by Trina Read on November 11, 2009 at 8:16am — No Comments

Do women really hit their sexual peak mid-30s

Is it true that women reach their sexual peak in their 30s?

No, there isn’t a decade when a woman reaches her sexual peak.

Dr. Alfred Kinsey book’s Sexual Behavior in the Human Female published in 1953 started this rumor. In the 1940s Kinsey took the sex histories of over 5,000 women and found that the majority hit their sexual stride mid-thirties. As premarital sex was a no-no, by her mid-thirties a woman had been married with a few kids and was therefore less… Continue

Added by Trina Read on September 25, 2009 at 9:53am — 1 Comment

Are You Always too Tired for Sex?

Are you always too tired for sex?

I'm sorry to say this but it is an old belief system that has become a well accepted excuse for women to not want sex.

No doubt, there are many times when a woman/ couple is too tired to have sex. Generally though, being tired shouldn’t equate to a person’s motivation to have sex—a.k.a. sexual desire.

(Analogy: Some women feel she has gained weight because of pregnancy. While the dramatic increase in weight over 9 months, plus all the… Continue

Added by Trina Read on September 12, 2009 at 7:39am — No Comments

Are Fantasies Realistic for Most Couples?

Fantasies are an easy way to add incredible zest to any sexual encounter. Best of all they’re fun, easy and free.

Although I wholeheartedly encourage any couple to undertake and integrate fantasy as part of their love making, I wonder how realistic it is. It seems to me couples who struggle just to keep sex going on a semi-regular basis might feel overwhelmed to introduce such adventure.

As such, I want to take a poll. My question: Is fantasy something you would… Continue

Added by Trina Read on August 15, 2009 at 9:02am — 1 Comment

Where's the Fun Gone?

I popped in on my colleague, Susan Naylen Sorrell, who owns a wonderful, mom-friendly sex shop in Calgary called, A Little More Interesting.

With a mischievous glint in her eye she said, “Trina, you have to watch this!” And sent me home to review, the Pirates 2 Stagnetti’s Revenge; a four disk porn epilogue that is a spoof on The Pirates of the Caribbean series.*

Upon arriving home, my thirteen month old… Continue

Added by Trina Read on July 5, 2009 at 8:26am — 2 Comments

He Likes Blow Up Dolls...So What?

While speaking at the Taboo Sex Show, a colleague mentioned a discussion with her morning waiter from our hotel restaurant. When he found out what she was selling at the show, he confessed no woman he has met was “perfect” enough for him.

As such he decided the best compromise was to buy a perfectly proportioned blow up doll. Problem was it was going to cost him $10,000 USD plus. He had been saving from his two waitering jobs since and had almost come up with the entire amount. He… Continue

Added by Trina Read on June 26, 2009 at 7:16am — 1 Comment

It's a Sex Fact...

Is your vagina fully aroused before you start having intercourse?

Women (and men) assume that because she’s had an orgasm that her orgasmic platform is properly aroused. It’s usually not the case. It takes the average woman between 10 to 15 minutes for her orgasmic platform to fully engorge with blood (a man's penis takes approximately 30 seconds to one minute). The average couple sex lasts for 10 to 12 minutes, meaning sex is usually over just as she's getting properly… Continue

Added by Trina Read on June 7, 2009 at 1:55pm — No Comments

It's a Sex Fact...

Did you know...

Doing Kegels for two minutes a day will raise both his and her arousal, desire and make for bigger, better orgasms.

Just like any muscle in your body, if you don't 'exercise' your vaginal canal or penis, those muscles will begin to atrophy. Doing Kegels daily brings blood flow to those areas and increases awareness, which makes it easier to become aroused. And because you're exercising those muscles, your orgasms will become… Continue

Added by Trina Read on May 10, 2009 at 11:33am — No Comments

Woman wants to orgasm 'naturally'

Hey Dr. Trina!

Since my ex (5-6 years ago) I have had trouble letting go and having orgasms. Some background is that I used to have no trouble having orgasms on top riding a man, but then he said it has always been uncomfortable for him. This was two years into our relationship and I took it very personally. I have never been able to orgasm with oral sex but only started enjoying oral sex with my last boyfriend.

The long and short is that I can't orgasm with a man unless I use a… Continue

Added by Trina Read on April 12, 2009 at 9:51am — 2 Comments

She Wants Oral Sex

Here's a very interesting reader question:

“My new boyfriend doesn’t like to give oral sex. I don’t think I’ll be very satisfied without it, but I don’t want to pressure him to do something he doesn’t want to do! How do I handle this?”

My Response: I would bet that he either doesn’t feel very confident in his oral sex ability or he had a bad experience that turned him off of giving oral sex.

You need to have a conversation, outside the bedroom, to find if it is… Continue

Added by Trina Read on March 15, 2009 at 10:29am — No Comments

Bet you didn't know this about vibrators...

How hysteria was once treated…

Vibrators got their start during the industrial revolution as medical devices and were used to treat hysteria in women. Hysteria was a catchall diagnosis that included a wide array of women’s medical complaints, from simple irritability to debilitating physical weakness. Many medical experts believed these symptoms were caused by a prolonged lack of sexual gratification. Ironic given that acceptable sexual relationship existed only within marriage and… Continue

Added by Trina Read on March 8, 2009 at 10:24am — 1 Comment

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