Married Life from Hitched - Social network for married couples

Why is it the more you talk about how rough your life is, the rougher it gets? Why is it the more you say you're underappreciated and overworked, the truer it seems to get?

I’m waiting at the cleaners for them to find my favorite cream blouse with no help from me, because of course I forgot (lost? trashed?) the little ticket they give you. There’s a woman and her friend waiting also, and the woman is saying “Well that’s just the way it is. Life’s a struggle and then you die. “ “Still unhappy at work?” the friend commiserates. “Yeah, my boss is an idiot. I’ll never get anywhere with the company and frankly, the clients are fools.” “I thought you just got a raise” the friend replies, “Right, cost of living, hardly counts,” the woman says, and I’m horrified. I can’t help but think “Poor woman, does she know what she’s doing? Does she know that the words she using are making her experience that much worse?”

Words have power! Words shape how you experience life.

When you start off with “Life’s a struggle,” I promise you, you’ll see struggle all around you. When you categorize your boss as an idiot, idiocy is all you will perceive. And if the only thing you can think in getting a raise is “yeah, right, cost of living” – well then, you’ve just sucked the joy out of your raise.

What’s the response? Turn into a Pollyanna and run around gushing sugary platitudes?
Certainly not! Better to turn into a realist. Pay attention to the words you use to describe your life and get more accurate with them. Say: “Sometimes my boss has good ideas, and sometimes he doesn’t." Or say, "It’s a challenge to get ahead with this company" not "I’ll never get ahead."

Your subconscious hears every word you say. It takes that as literal truth and if you tell it, “I’ll never get ahead with this company,” you will not see the opportunities for advancement that do exist.

Don't do that to yourself – you deserve better! You deserve success.

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