Noelle Nelson's Page

Your husband wakes up grumpy, stumbles to the bathroom, glances at your reflection next to his in the mirror, and says “What’s wrong with your hair?” You glare: “I slept on it funny. Good morning to you too.”

Strike one against husband: “Why do you have to be so unpleasant first thing?”

You’re marshalling the kids’ breakfasts, making their lunches, packing backpacks. Your spouse enters, clean-shaven, ready to go. He holds out his car-coffee-cup: “We’re out of coffee.” “So, make…

Ack!! Your computer is acting up—again—and despite hitting “escape” and every other “get-me-outta-here” key you can think of,  you’re in frozen hell. “I hate this computer!” you mutter. Your co-worker glances over at you, “That’s what you always say. Maybe you should try talking pretty to it.” You snort, “Right! And the computer can hear me and will suddenly unlock itself. I’ll bet you still believe in Santa Claus.” Your co-worker shrugs: “Works for me.”

You grumble and…

You know how it goes. You’re huddled around the coffee machine, riveted, listening to a co-worker’s latest rendition of “and then Tom texted Thea saying she was a conniving . ..”

Oh, the fun of office gossip! Oh, the titillation and subversive thrill that comes out of “I know something about you that you don’t know that I know… and I’ve made sure all the with-it people know and ha-ha doesn’t that make me smart and you dumb!” Sometimes it’s not even something real –…

You run from store to store looking for that perfect Valentine’s Day gift, the one that will truly express how you feel about your love. And be something she or he will really likes.

Right. That last part’s a bit of a problem. The things your beloved will really like may be way outside your pocket-book, so back you go into the mall – or into a more intensive web-search.

Then of course, there’s shopping for the perfect Valentine Day experience, because heaven knows, going to…

You know your usual litany of New Year’s resolutions: “This year I’m gonna lose 5 – 10 -50 pounds. This year I swear I’ll get to the gym at least twice a week. This year I absolutely positively will not spend past my credit limit. This year I swear I’ll never have another ginger Martini (given the consequences of your last bout with said delectable beverage).

It’s your standard January 1 list most years – and it’s a great list!

But how about if instead of – or in addition to -…