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I've been married 25 years. We argue all the time, hardly talk, hes very unemotional and insensitive. We had a lot of very big arguments, not intimacy for over 2 years and the only thing that I acn think about is leaving and I told him that. He says can't wait for me to go. Told him I don't smoke, drink, do drugs or gamble but I won;t give up sex.

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I've been divorced in the past, and it seemed to me that the hardest part was actually making the decision to leave and end the marriage. It will be hard in the beginning, but each day gets easier.
Just keep in mind that lots of guys, even the ones who are miserable in their relationships, have a problem when the woman is the one who decides to end things. He may decide that he doesn't want to get divorced after all, and you may decide to take him back, but just make sure you are 100% that is what you want, and not that he is manipulating you.
Be strong!
It is hard, but its all I think about. He says at this point that he doesn't care what I do, and I know that. Being that the real-estate market is horrible right now I will wait to sell my house, most likely file for divorce n the meantime. He told me that he refuses to pay alimony but in New Jersey its mandatory, and that he will have absolutely nothing to do with me once its over. I told him its impossible we have 2 grown children and we will run into each other from time to time. I thought about this long and hard for at least 6 years and unhappy for 10.
Sylvia,

Thank you for your response. It has been 25 years but, I stayed for the kids. For the past 7 -10 years I have been un happy. He is verbally abusive insensitive and he actually said I don't desire you, not interested and no one wants me. I know better. What is keeping me is finance. If I can really afford to be out on my own. I would love to.
Try FamilyLife for some more answers.
When I choose to get divorced I was under the same finance rock you are looking at. In the end the struggle it takes to make end meet is nothing compaired to the emotional and mental abuse. You can stay untill thing are better or you can leave and make them better for yourself. It's hard,but the work affirms your worthiness as a person and more so as a parent!!! The world is waiting for you and life is short. It is time you see your dream of happiness realized.....by you!!! Go Get Em!~!!!
Yours is good, if only i can increase my sex life, i will not be scared of loosing my husband to other women some day. make your husband jelous and insicure by dresing more sexy, go outting alone and starve him with sex, you will see him begging for you to stay with him. Check out the woman he is with, find out her secret on how she got you husband hooked up. Do thesame to get your man back, get you hair do, go to the beautisians to get a tourch on your make ups, get your finger done. Even if your husband does not want you anymore, you will get other men who will appreciate the creation of God in you.

Bibianna.
I don't agree. It's not what men are seeing or not seeing in you,it's what you believe about yourself. We are all imperfect,but we all are imperfect,understand? No one guy has and is everything and no one woman is either. We must accept ourselves so we can really understand our strengths and weekness' and work on each accordingly. It's no ones judgement except our own that matters. Yes?

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Episode 453: How Do Inform Family Members of an Abuser Within the Family?

A listener reached out to say they knew of abuse in the family and told other members about it, but weren't getting the response they were hoping for. Dr. Karen Sherman offers advice.

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