Is it over?

My wife and I have been married for 15 years. We dated for a year and then were engaged for another. We have three great boys. Five years ago our youngest son became very ill and spent 6 weeks in a hospital and the 6 more months in rehab relearning everything (sitting up, talking, walking etc). Anyways over the years my wife has become very involved in local children charties and we're on one of the boards. About 8 months ago we got further news that my son could be terminal. So far everything has worked out an right now he has a very good prognosis. Our relationship turned at this point as I just wanted to take it one step at a time and only rely on what was confirmed and not the future prognosis. I did not take into account my wife's devastation. I pushed her to to forgot about the future, live in the present and ignored her signs of depression. I asked that she go seek professional advice before taking medications. Our relationship fell apart further. She started attaching herself to others and left me to be with our other boys. This is how it was 5 years ago during the hospitalization. Now we're going on 9 months. I've been to counseling like I was told. Changed my attitude, character and regained my relationship with my boys. My wife just ignores me. Won't talk to me. Won't tell me anything. She's starting counseling (one session) but the counselor wants to see us seperately for a time. I've found out through her friends, that she's accused me of abuse, unsure what kind. She's threatend to change the locks on me, stays out til 1 or 2 am with friends, talks on the phone every night for 2 or 3 hours, wont'd do anything with me. Lately she won't even be in the same room as me. She sleeps on the couch. I try to show my concern for her as a human being and as a husband. I ask nothing in return. I jsut want to give it a shot. She doesn't feel she can trust me. Do I give up? I love her maybe too much?